DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
LOVE TAKES TIME
by Bob Davidson,
Director USA Family Life Chaplain Training Program
Why Does It Happen? And
How Can It Be Stopped?
"Sally reported that she grew up in a well-ordered, strict
Christian home. Her father was very disappointed that she, his oldest child, was not a boy. He required her to do heavy chores
on the farm.
When Sally was 19 she was raped by a Christian young man
who also came from a very strict home. She became pregnant. Furious, her father kicked and abused her, and encouraged her
siblings to do likewise. Once he pinched her earlobes with a pair of pliers because she did not hear him calling her. Her
mother tried to shield her from the abuse, but to no avail.
Sally is now a grown woman with children. She does not understand
how her father, an active Christian and a leader in the church, could have abused her. Although she attends church, the memories
of her father overshadow any concept of a loving God.
Pam worked in a Christian institution for almost 30 years.
During most of those years she was battered by her Christian husband. She sought help from the church members, but they would
not believe her "stories." She eventually confided in her pastor.
He encouraged her to stay in the relationship for "the Lord’s
sake." When she told the story, her arm was in a cast. Her husband was still abusing her.
Why didn’t she leave? She did not want to bring shame
upon her church or be shunned by church members. Having a very meager retirement income of her own, she does not think that
she could live on her own."
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