"Do not enter the path of the wicked and do
not proceed in the way of evil men. Avoid it, do not pass by it; Turn away from it and pass on. For they cannot sleep unless
they do evil; And they are robbed of sleep unless they make someone stumble. For they eat the bread of wickedness, and drink
the wine of violence."
Proverbs 5:14-17
Frequently in my domestic violence and abuse research, I come
across the terms, Sociopath, and Psychopath. I don’t know much about either in their clinical environment, but I have
come to realize that I know people who fit each profile to a tee! The frightening part is, they are all around us, friends,
neighbors, relatives, co-workers, and even our own children.
Like many others, I equated the terms "Sociopath" and "Psychopath"
with murderers such as Charles Manson, or Ted Bundy. If a person’s behavior and actions weren’t sinister in nature
(to us), they would just be dismissed as, “He’s acting crazy.” “He’s selfish.” “She
is self-centered.” Or, “He is so cold!” The reality is, the people that I know who fit these two profiles
truly possess sinister persona’s.
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The grime truth is, we have dated, married, divorced, befriended,
worked beside, grew up with, lived next door to, even birthed personalities who exhibit characteristics that are:
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Threatening
-
Portending in evil - (warning you of evil intents)
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Harm - (violence, abuse, torture, verbal abuse)
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Trouble
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Base - (dishonest, vulgar, faithless, unprincipled, low, mean,
etc.)
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Wicked
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Ominous - (menacing, boding evil, threatening, etc)
There are more adjectives listed, but I believe this list will
suffice to make my point. A Sociopath possesses many personality traits that we are very familiar with:
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Manipulative
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Conning
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Liars
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No sense of shame, guilt or remorse
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Shallow emotions, especially love
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Abusive, lack of self-control
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Paranoid
The list is extensive. Trouble is, as women, we are often caught
up in addictive love, nurturing, fixing, and trying to change the unwanted behaviors from our mates. Technically, that makes
us manipulative and controlling as well. Not in the same light as the abusers who are making life miserable. But we are
in fact trying to manipulate a more positive result-eliminating the abuse.
When women are in abusive relationships or marriages, they are
constantly brain storming to come up with ways to get the desired behaviors from abusive partners. In order to get the abuser
to stop, hitting, lying, cheating, verbally abusing, being cold, treating you poorly in general, you come up with ways to
appease. Been there-it doesn't work!
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Once you begin to learn about the various personality types that
are among us, you will eventually stop blaming yourself for the abuse you are suffering. The Sociopath, Psychopath, and the
Narcissist males that we date and marry are largely responsible for the insanity that we often experience. You are not crazy!
But they can create such a whirlwind in your life, that you will question your own thinking. I have done so, many times.
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LINKS TO MORE INFORMATION:
Sociopath- Psychopath-Narcissistic Personalities
“Something’s wrong here but I can’t quite put my finger on it."
“Psychopaths have no conscience and their only goal is self-gratification. Many of us
have been their victims -- at work, through friendships or relationships -- and not one of us can say, "a psychopath could
never fool me."
…“most of the two million psychopaths in North America aren't murderers. They're our friends, lovers
and co-workers. They're outgoing and persuasive, dazzling you with charm and flattery. Often you aren't even aware they've
taken you for a ride -- until it's too late."
http://www.mcafee.cc/Bin/sb.html
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IT'S ALL ABOUT HIM!
No doubt you have either thought this way about your
mate, or you have expressed it. It has nothing to do with you. Stop blaming yourself, buy this book, and save your sanity!
About the Author
"Lisa E. Scott is a native
of the Chicagoland area. She lives and works downtown as a human resources professional. She has been published twice in academic
journals related to her profession. "It's All About Him" is her first work of a personal nature."
http://www.lisaescott.com/
NOTE:
Lisa's website contains posts from women who share their stories openly. If you would like to know more about Narcissistic
behaviors, this is a good place to start.
I hand-picked the following books from Amazon.com. I cannot
stress enough that along with reading God's Word, that you educate yourself through other literature as well.
In order to avoid the pain, heartache, abuse, and all the mind
bending problems of past relationships, ladies, we must become stronger. Knowledge is POWERFUL, and God expects us to acquire
it, especially spiritually.
Hosea 4:6 says, "My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge."
"Our Lord is a God of knowledge" - (1 Sam 2:3)
"The fear of God is the beginning of knowledge" -(Proverbs 1:22)
"The wise store up knowledge" - (Proverbs 10:14)
"...knowledge increases power" - (Proverbs 24:5)
Most of all, were are admonished to "grow in grace and knowledge" -
(2 Peter 3:18)
AND WHAT IS KNOWLEDGE? Information!
MORE LINKS:
PROTECTING YOURSELF!
The Difference Between a Psychopath and
a Sociopath
SOCIOPATH-THE LIES THEY TELL!
AFTERMATH: SURVIVING PSYCHOPATHY
NOTE: This link has a forum
for issues and questions about psychopathy
The Signs of a Sociopath
How to Spot Mr or Ms Cold and Charming
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Are You In a Pathological Relationship Quiz
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