In times past, I regularly read Black love stories in certain magazines. Many of these magazines posted ads in the back for various kinds of “spiritual” channels. There was nothing elaborate about the black and white ads; however, I did take note of the “buzz words” that were used. Today, fortune tellers can be found on the internet, with more enticing advertisement – not limited to African-Americans.  Fortune telling is big business that rakes in millions of dollars each year.  It is an unregulated “craft” that attracts gullible souls who have a need to have their itching ears scratched, (2 Timothy 4:3). In other words many people want life to turn out the way they want it to, and fortune tellers tell them the lies they want to hear, and nothing more.

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To give the seeker a feeling of comfort, many fortune tellers use in their titles – “Sister;  Rev.;  Mother; Rev. Mother; Rev. Sister; African Spiritual Healer; Ordained Psychic – Christian Reader & Adviser," and the like.  If their titles don’t draw you to them, perhaps their areas of supposed expertise will. Most shamans lay claim to being able to solve all of your problems, no matter what they are: hexes; roots; marriage; divorce; money; spells and much more. “Does your body itch?” “Are you unhappy, unloved?” “Do you think you have been fixed by the evil influences of voodoo?” “Is it hard for you to find a job?” “Do you want to get lucky, and stay lucky?”

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“Do you gamble, play numbers and can’t seem to win?” “I can also restore lost nature.” “I can show you how to have success in everything you do.” “Is your hair falling out?” “Are you sick?” “Lonely for loved ones?” “Need a sweetheart?” “Get your voice read by telephone.” “Born gifted – holy woman – World’s No. 1 psychic, ESP, Voice vibrations; calls enemies names, restores nature.”

They also claim quick results: “Results in three days.” “Results in minutes, hours, seconds – by telephone, or write to …” “Satisfaction guaranteed.” “Call today, and get rid of all your troubles.” “Guaranteed to help anywhere in the world, within hours.” “Immediate results.” “ Fast results – honest answers.” “Bring your problems to Rev. ****** today, and be rid of them tomorrow.” “Guarantees all work in 3 days.”  “WHY SUFFER when you can be helped and freed from all your troubles?” “Spells performed immediately!”

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The shamans compete with one another: “The world’s greatest Psychic, Reader, and Healer.” “I guarantee to do what others only claim to do.” “Rev. Sister ****, where others have failed, she will help you.” “I swear to help you.” “The best in the country on court cases of all kinds.” “I solemnly swear help where others have failed you.”  Sister ****, “I am the most powerful of all healers.” “Other readers come to Sister ****.” Now this one really takes the cake. A spiritualist, Mother ******, Healer and Advisor, “I guarantee to help you were (where) – others faild (failed). I help in all probems (problems). I guess for this particular spiritualist, spelling wasn’t that important. I point out the spelling mistakes in this advertisement to highlight the ignorance of it all.

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The worst lie of all – many fortune tellers and the like claim a relationship with God: “God given power to heal by prayer.” “I have dedicated my life to do God’s work, and help His children in their time of need.”  “Friends, we urge you to call this Religious Holy Woman Healer – God’s messenger.” “Dial a miracle.” “God given powers to help all.” “I was born with God given power to help you – I will tell you your past, and your future. Palm and card reader, “My work is with God.” (Mother **** also claims to be a “religious woman” who is “God’s messenger” – “the woman you have been looking for.” Also, Mother **** requests that you do not “compare” her with “other readers that have “failed you in the past.”  

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